Monday, September 27, 2010

life of the unemployed - what's life like outside of the corporate job?

Imagine this: not having to drive your painfully long commute to work, or having time to finally meet up with your friends for a 5PM happy hour at that cool downtown bar you’ve always wanted to check out.  I always imagined that my life of unemployment would be great: sleeping in, vacationing, eating ice cream, watching lots of television, partying it up …   I imagined all this plentiful free time I would have to do all the things I never get to do.  It’s supposed to be great.  I thought how lovely it would be to have time to do groceries and cook at home, how clean my place would be, how happy my dog would be to have me around more often. 

It is great.  It’s awesome.  …   Just the part about the plentiful amounts of free time to play and hang out, that part is a myth.  Well, at least for me, I'm busier more than ever.

What have I been doing?  Well…  I left my nice salaried job back in July 2010, and for that first month afterwards: 1) I did an independent contract gig at Expedia for a month, 2) I went to Hawaii for the first time in my life for a week, and 3) then came back to a to-do list as long as the Nile River (I brought my trusty notebook with me to Hawaii and jotted notes down while there).  The second month, ...  Click here to read more

~Arry

Sunday, September 12, 2010

[10] 5 ways social media has changed dating


I love social media.  I'm all over it - Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, Blogger, etc...  I love how it's allowed me to keep in touch with friends all over the world, reconnect me with friends from decades ago, and build new ones in our ever so busy lives.  Even with Twitter, I cannot thank this tool for how many awesome women I've been able to connect with because of it.  Social media is fun when it comes to dating - you can instantaneously see how your love is doing throughout his day, see the comments from those in his life, virtually flirt back and forth, ... social media provides tools for building authentic relationships --> but in the world of dating, it is truly important to remember to consistently use the more traditional means in growing faith, trust and strength in your love: holding hands, talking on the phone, going on walks, cuddling, kissing, and eye contact (some of my absolute favorites).

As much as I love social media, there are some new challenges and changes it has produced in the world of dating and love.  Some things I've learned and will share:

1. Online personalities do not necessarily present the real person as they are in real life.  The person who interact with and see online is not necessarily the same person in person.  Why?  The person you are building in your mind from watching the conversations and persona's online creates a person that is a little different then who that person is in real life.  Without the other communication cues like facial expressions, body language and tone, what else do you have to work with?  None - you interpret with the lens and bias that you hope to find in this person.

Read the rest by clicking here... 

~Arry

[9] the disengaged and the 'absent-present'


It's super annoying, and we all do it.  The guy in the meeting checking and responding to emails, totally ignoring the actual meeting and people in the room.  The guy  talking shop during dinner at a restaurant with his girlfriend, while she sits there trying to be polite while looking painfully bored.  No, actually, she reaches into her purse and pulls our her own cell phone to check her messages.  Better yet, notice how people in the Pacific Northwest tend to look down when crossing a street, rarely ever do they look both ways.  It gets more fun when you have a person staring at their crack-traption as they cross the street.  What about when you're in a conversation, say with two other friends, and someone's cell chirps or rings MID-conversation - and the friend responds to it.  WHAT?  Yes, that happens too.  What gives one the right to throw all the rules of etiquette, honor and respect out the window because the crap-traption is ringing, dinging, and vibrating?  (I get it, there are special circumstances when this is excused - but hopefully, you still say "excuse me" to those present before going there.)

Click here to read more...

Thanks,
Arry

[8] 20 relationship rules

I've been working on this list for the past year or so, and it's been revised so many times.  Of course, this is from my perspective, a woman who dates a man.  Anyways - here's the current state it's in.  I welcome your feedback + thoughts.  xoxo

1.  Love yourself.  Be yourself.  Be true to yourself.  Be good to yourself.  Take care of yourself.
2.  If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.  If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
3.  Trust your gut.  Don't make excuses.  Own it. 
4.  Don't try and change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

Click here to continue...

Thanks,
Arry

[7] my cocoon


MY COCOON: I have gone through and am currently still going through quite a bit of change in my life.  I'm questioning who, what, when, where, why, and how ...  what am I willing to do, how far am I willing to go, at what expense/investment, and for what result?  Right now, it feels like I am nearing the closing finale to my 4 year stay in my cocoon - and I am doing the final revision putting on the finishing touches to me.  I am refining and working to fine tune the person I am.  Post cocoon?  I will come out knowing and liking the person I am, or rather, pretty darn close to whatever that answer is at the end.  It's probably always going to be a work in progress...  Read rest of the story here.

~Arry 
P.S. I've started a new site (www.arryinseattle.com) where all my posts will be going.  I will selectively post some of them here as well in the meantime.